Friday, March 31, 2006

FROM THE BASS'S GILLS

"We've invited that Stickler character back again to dress up in a full-body bass costume and have at the Rival Room. He couldn't type at all with the fin-styled gloves that came with the costume. And the whole thing was made of crushed velvet, so he was sweating like Peter North. But he performed like him too, and spewed his saltwater-laced opinion regarding Indiana University's recent hiring compromise." - Rival Room Editors

by Josh Stickler, www.sticklersworld.blogspot.com

I had a plan, I had a mission, a goal you may call it. I was going to write about what makes a coach great. I was going to tell the readers a story from my childhood. Entailing me being beaned with a baseball and how the coach motivated me to step back out to the plate and hit a home run. All about how bad coaches can break a team and how a great coach is loved by all. And then…

I awoke this morning, after the longest day of work I have had in a long time, turned on SportsCenter and saw that Indiana University had hired Mike Davis’s replacement. As I read article after article, quote after quote from new sources, former players, and sports commentators I made a brash decision. In true “Naked Gun� fan form; I extended my left arm, slowly raised my middle finger, and repeatedly pressed the delete key on my keyboard. Erasing from existence everything I had written so as a loyal Hoosier I could write what follows:

Indiana; cornfields, sheep farming, little pink houses, small towns, pizza express, and BASKETBALL. Hoosiers are known for their love of this sport. When talking to a Hoosier any mention of other sports will get you a reaming, with the exception of NFL Football. Hoosiers as well all know, was even a movie about a high school basketball team overcoming the odds, were talking serious stuff in this state.

“In 49 states it's just basketball ... but this is Indiana."
-- Video boards in Conseco Fieldhouse.

So when a basketball coach gets fired (Bobby Knight), or a basketball coach submits his resignation (Mike Davis), or a new coach is named (Kelvin Sampson) it’s news that needs to be talked about, ridiculed, and understood.

Over the last few weeks my worry was that IU would hire Steve Alford, former IU player and not so good coach at Iowa. So Steve, the Hawkeye’s went out in the first round, nice job. I don’t believe Alford was fit to coach our team anyways, once you take one look at his record at Iowa; .570 winning percentage. I'd assume many other coaches can do better then that. My friend Brian is quoted as saying, “If IU took Alford, then they would never be able to fire him because he is part of the Bobby Knight era.� I bet he read it online. I agree, however, so props to IU for not making this mistake.

Instead the choice has been Kelvin Sampson. At first I was weary, a little pissed. I was reading the media again, so instead I did some research. Let’s start with the negatives. Can we say; NCAA violations and an entire team that didn’t graduate. IU is known for the success rate of their student athletes. Bobby was a big proponent of his players doing well in academics. In order for Kelvin Sampson to stay in the administration and alumni favor he is going to have to do this as well. Another negative is Oklahoma was the first big program that he has coached at. I know Mike Davis was thrown into the job, but does IU really want another coach to come along who doesn’t have a lot of experience? The players. With him IU will lose people that fans have grown to love, but most of them are graduating anyways, so maybe this isn’t that big of a negative.

Now what’s good about him? He has no ties to Knight's administration. This is good because people of Indiana, this is hard for me to say, but it is time for Hoosiers to get over the past. We need to embrace something new if we want the glory days of basketball like we used to have. His record at Oklahoma is impeccable, taking the Sooners to the tourney in 11 of 12 seasons. With him, IU is going to start getting the recruitment in Big 12 Country that they have always wanted, and that leads to more winning. So does he sound like that bad of a choice? Not really! When you weigh the pros and cons, as long as he follows the rules the NCAA have set down he is a pretty sharp pick for IU. It really was nothing for myself or Brian to get worked up about.

So to the people of Indiana, I support the decision. I am ready for the new era and I will not treat this coach like a substitute of Bobby Knight like I did the last one. So let’s raise a toast to Coach Sampson. “Never daunted we shall not faulter, in the battle were tried and true, Indiana our Indiana, Indiana were all for you, IU!�


Best of the Rival Room

The Top 50 Movie Rivalries of All Time
The Top 50 WWF Rivalries of All Time
The Top 30 Villains in a Sports Movie
Top 17 Advertising Logo Look-A-Likes
Mark Prior is a Tender Cha Cha
Rivalfish's Definitive Look-A-Like List
The Top 50 Manliest Men of All Time
The Top 10 Party Schools on Weed
The Slap Heard 'Round Chicago
Top 5 Acting Performances by a Pro Athlete
The Top 25 Ugliest People in Sports
The Top 5 Trashiest Fanbases
Red Sox v. Yankees - The Hot Chicks Version
11 Best Stoner-Created Saturday Morning Cartoon Intros
Top Five MLBers You'd Hate to Have Sleep With Your Sister
A Babe, A Dog, And A Dick

Best Of Rival Room Music

The Top 50 Cover Songs of All Time
Jon Uncle Rico Gries Real Rivalfish Interview
Is Bonnaroo the Next NASCAR?
Out Of His League: Roger, Roger Waters
David Byrne at Canegie Hall: Don't Fence Him In
Out Of His League: The End of a Stereotype
Vegoose in Vegas: Finding Authenticity in Music and Vice
ME and the KEY(S) to UMPHREY'S MCGEE: The Joel Cummins Interview
Top 10 Moments of Lollapalooza
10,000 Lakes Music Festival Ticket Giveaway
Top 21 Band/Food Pairings for Lollapalooza
Rivalfish's 2006 Song of the Year: Everybody Daylight

 

Home | ESPN.com | CBSSportsline | Yahoo! Sports | NationalLampoon.com| Contact Us

DISCLAIMER: All public characters, names and places used in Rivalfish's Rival Room (whether online, in print or any other media) are fictitious and are used herein for the purposes of comment, criticism, parody, or mere entertainment. Any similarity to real people, without parodic purpose, is a coincidence. All trade names, product names and trademarks of third parties, including any trademarked characters, used in the Rival Room are used without the authorization of those third parties, and are used only for the purpose of parody and identification. No sponsorship, endorsement or affiliation by or with those third parties exists or should be implied.

Copyright © Rivalfish, Inc. 2006

Site Development : Twilight Pictures Productions, LLC

Rivalfish Partners: The StairWay Studios
Cassiday Schade, LLP