TERRELL OWENS HAS SENT YOU AN EVITE INVITATION

By Tony
prayers4mojo@gmail.com

There are just some things a man is not allowed to do for himself. He cannot give himself a nickname- if you give yourself a nickname it's up to your friends to come up with a more insulting, emasculating nickname by which you will subsequently be known. Something basic, like "Old Maid" or "Twat Chops." You also cannot throw a birthday party for yourself. If you want a birthday party, it's up to your girlfriend, friends or family to set it up for you. Perhaps the rules are different for the rich and famous, and as we've seen many times in the past, the rules that apply to the rest of society often do not pertain to Dallas Cowboys receiver Terrell Owens. So every year T.O. throws himself a birthday bash, maybe because nobody else would do it for him and maybe because he's so narcissistic that he can't think of anyone better to set it up. Either way, the party has become a highly publicized yearly event complete with celebrity guests and a red carpet entrance. But before now there was little to no chance of you getting in the door, that is, before we here at The Rival Room got our hands on the exclusive Evite to T.O.'s birthday party.* As with most Evites, witty responses and hysterical jokes abound. So click the link below for the details and guest list for Terrell Owens' 34th Birthday Bonanaza!

TERRELL OWENS HAS SENT YOU AN EVITE INVITATION!!!

*Not real, not even remotely. Dumbass.